Some people

In the previous post I mentioned traveling to northern Ohio locations to check on soybean research plots.  If you are not excited by a vast expanse of flat earth festooned with soybean field and corn field followed closely by another soybean field which is in turn followed by another corn field for mile after mile and on and on… well, perhaps the northwestern quarter of Ohio may grow tedious for you.  Not for me, love the crops; but that’s just me.  Perhaps I’m fairly well suited for my chosen profession.

If you do find yourself cruising through this countryside, lamenting your poor fortune for nothing extraordinary to view, then the occasional small town might offer some respite from the monotonous scenery.

Enter the village of Wayne Ohio in Wood County, just southeast of Bowling Green.  Passing through the other day I spied the following sign painted on the building at the corner of Main and Center.

sign-at-wayne-oh

Pretty much says what it needs to say. I can get by not knowing who that one person is.

This might pass for just a cute curiosity.  But upon reflection I began to wonder whether the sorehead indicated was indeed the author of the signage who felt compelled to share some self-depreciating wit.  Or, is this a poke at some fellow Waynesian who could use a little needling.  Perhaps neither of these suggestions fits; could be the sign painter bumped his or her head that morning on the way to paint the wall.  With some imagination I think we might find other worthy explanations for this sign (and please, if you have such – tuck it in below in the comments).

While I really don’t find myself needing to know who the one sorehead in Wayne OH is, I am struck by the relative rarity of soreheads in their nice little town.  One in 843 is a mere tenth of one per cent (or 0.001186 if your calculator is handy).  Not too bad by my reckoning.  Why among the several hundred folk I can identify I would rank at least a handful as soreheads.  Maybe I travel in a harsher crowd.  At any rate, I have to hand it to the good folks of Wayne – if you only have one sorehead in your midst you might be doing something right.

Finally, I have to wonder whether they’ll keep the sign’s statistics very accurate.  I understand the Kurtzweilers are expecting twins any time now.

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4 comments

  1. NW Ohio “Tedious”? Blasphemy!

    Still ain’t so sure on Henry but pretty sure I know who Wayne references.

    Is it true, as they say, that the pain in Wayne comes mainly from the grain?

    Like

    1. Are you thinking Mad Anthony? You would have Wikipedia on your side if so.

      If I might riff on your pain in Wayne idea I would offer instead that the pain in Wayne comes mainly from a lack of rain (which ends up as less grain).

      Like

      1. Yep, the mad one himself. I’d be mad too if I had to build a road through the Great Black Swamp while dodging arrows, getting malaria and drinking bad coffee.

        I noticed also that reports of the migraine in Wayne fell awfully close to Main.

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Rhymes at times can be pretty cool.
        When not authored by an old coot or fool.

        As you’re not qualified on this latter matter.
        Please go on and offer up your best banter.

        WordPress might demure, their software used such.
        But we shouldn’t stifle our thoughts (or not much).

        Poems are made by fools like me,
        But only JB can go measure a tree.

        Let’s hope Juan Felipe Herrera doesn’t get ill if he passes this way.

        Liked by 1 person

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